The Americans left today for the long trip back to the United States. I am still in awe of Curt; he is definitely larger than life. We were sad to see them leave; no doubt like the people of Normandy were at the end of the war. The buzz that they brought with them has gone and it's back to reality.
The friendly English family invited me round for a game of cards. I suspect it was out of sympathy as earlier, I had proposed a game of Risk with them. They looked at me strangely when I mentioned "would you like to play a game of risk". From the look in their eyes, I imagined that they thought that they had booked a holiday at a swingers convention. When I explained that it was the board game based on world domination, they seemed more at ease.
I have been missing speaking English and my wife knew that. She suggested that I ask them but I sensed that they did not want to play. I started thinking about the garlic sausage once more and took the hint and retired to the house. To my surprise, a little later, there was a knock at the door. "Would you like to come to the gite for a game of cards?", the English lady asked. Having had the knock back earlier with the offer of a game of risk, I thought about cutting my nose off to spite my face. Should I tell her that I was washing my hair? The fact that I have very little hair wouldn't have washed with her; me neither, so I accepted the offer.
I am sure that I have a problem with my memory and as I have trouble remembering certain things. I am sure that I have a problem with my memory and as I have trouble remembering certain things.I can't even remember the last time I played cards!
They explained the rules to me and sensing that I did not understand, they began to speak slower and louder; as people do with foreigners or people with learning difficulties. I probably seemed to fit the criteria in their eyes no doubt!
After the explanation, they asked if I understood. I seemed to have had the same feeling when I visited the Notaire the other week when I signed the legal papers for the house. She asked the same question; in French of course. "Do you understand?". I am sure I heard one of the English people mutter, "is he still breathing", as I had the blank look accross my face. "Oh, yes, of course. I understand". I am probably not a convincing liar as well as having a bad memory, learning difficulties and smelling of garlic sausage.
Beginners luck! After being explained the rules over and over again, I won the first round; or do they call it game? Perhaps they felt sorry for me and let the fat kid win to make his onlooking parents feel proud.
As the night went on, the conversation got funnier and funnier. We seemed to bounce of one another and before long, we were laughing uncontrollably. I can't remember the last time I laughed this much. I seem to forget a lot of things; however, I wanted to write this in my blog to help me remember this great time I had with them. I just wish I could bottle this humour as I am sure it would be great for a stand up routine. One of the big draw backs for being a comedian is that you have to remember the punch lines. For that, I am not destined for a life on stage.
The English people leave tomorrow. I wont mention their names but if they read this blog entry, I want to say thanks for coming to stay with us. It has been an absolute pleasure to have them stay with us and they are welcome back to our home anytime.
Having had great guests, it made me think about that awful Tripadvisor review that was wrongly aimed at Emma and me. Perhaps I should start a website where the owners of gites, hotels and bed & breakfast establishments could review their guests. That way, we could vet them before we allow them to reserve. It that site existed right now, I would certainly leave a review for the English family as follows:
5 stars out of 5
Adorable English family that are ambassadors for Great Britain. Very respectful, honest and very witty. Would I recommend them to other establishments? Yes; however, I would much prefer if they came back and stayed with us. As Curt would say: "They are amazing!"
Friday, 17 September 2010
Thursday, 16 September 2010
Battle of the bulge
I can't quite remember when I last wrote about cutting the grass. From what I remember, it wasn't that long ago. Where is all this grass coming from then? I glanced over at the land behind the house and it looks like the grass mounted a counter offensive and re-took the ground I had captured from the last offensive (Operation green grass).
The weather was good to mount my offensive to capture the terrain. After last nights soiree, I was feeling very fragile and all I really wanted to do was lie on the sofa and take a nap. I managed to motivate myself and fired up panzer Tom for the major attack.
This offensive was planned better than the last and it was all guns blazing; no prisoners taken today! All was going well until Tom started spluttering . It would appear that just like in the Battle of the Bulge, we had insufficient fuel to finish the attack. I'm not sure I would have found any American fuel dumps nearby, so I had no choice but to to pull back. I thought about destroying Tom so it could not fall into the hands of the enemy, but finally decided to push it back to the shed. I can imagine how those German tank commanders must have felt in the Ardennes in 1944. They had the tools to do the job but no fuel to finish it!
The weather was good to mount my offensive to capture the terrain. After last nights soiree, I was feeling very fragile and all I really wanted to do was lie on the sofa and take a nap. I managed to motivate myself and fired up panzer Tom for the major attack.
This offensive was planned better than the last and it was all guns blazing; no prisoners taken today! All was going well until Tom started spluttering . It would appear that just like in the Battle of the Bulge, we had insufficient fuel to finish the attack. I'm not sure I would have found any American fuel dumps nearby, so I had no choice but to to pull back. I thought about destroying Tom so it could not fall into the hands of the enemy, but finally decided to push it back to the shed. I can imagine how those German tank commanders must have felt in the Ardennes in 1944. They had the tools to do the job but no fuel to finish it!
Wednesday, 15 September 2010
Beats working for a living
Paranoia paid us a visit this morning. My wife had seen our English guests before they left for their day trip and she said that they didn't look happy. I wonder what is wrong with them? Is it the accommodation, is it us, had I brushed my teeth before I spoke with them; all that and a million other negative thoughts ran through my head. Just as the millionth negative thought entered my mind, my wife asked if I had brushed my teeth this morning; according to her, it smelt of garlic sausage. We had that last night so it made me think that I had found the culprit for their distant reaction this morning.
We are fully booked this week and have one English family and two American families. I had organised a soiree for the evening and asked if they would attend. My master plan was to bring us all together to chat and discuss the differences between our great nations. The only differences that I could think about after my wife told me the news of my garlic sausage breath, was that the American's probably spent more time with a toothbrush.
In the afternoon, I was invited to have a chat by the English family and as paranoia was still shadowing me, I was sure that it would be negative. In fact, it was the opposite. They were very positive about their holiday, the accommodation and didn't once mention the strange smell of garlic sausage that was following me.
Later that evening, having been shopping again for the bits and bobs for our evening party, true to their word, the guests started to arrive. After the obligatory pleasantries and wooden stances, we started to relax and started sharing stories. One of the American men, Curt, was a larger than life character. He would have not looked out of place in a holywood action movie; and yes, he had the perfect white teeth that makes all English people envious.
One of the major talking points for the evening was the lack of guns in England. The Americans sat on one side of the table scratching their heads, wondering why we do not have anti-tank weapons, proximity mines and 50mm machine guns in our living rooms. On the other side of the table, the English were mesmorised by the shiny white teeth of the Americans. Curt mentioned that he has a safe full of ammunition at his home in the United States and another full of weapons. I mentioned the fact that the British Army has insufficient money and materials to supply its soldiers fighting in Afghanistan. Perhaps he could help out and ship some equipment from his ranch.
As the beer flowed and the conversation moved from topic to guns and back to other topics, I couldn't help thinking that this beats working for a living!
We are fully booked this week and have one English family and two American families. I had organised a soiree for the evening and asked if they would attend. My master plan was to bring us all together to chat and discuss the differences between our great nations. The only differences that I could think about after my wife told me the news of my garlic sausage breath, was that the American's probably spent more time with a toothbrush.
In the afternoon, I was invited to have a chat by the English family and as paranoia was still shadowing me, I was sure that it would be negative. In fact, it was the opposite. They were very positive about their holiday, the accommodation and didn't once mention the strange smell of garlic sausage that was following me.
Later that evening, having been shopping again for the bits and bobs for our evening party, true to their word, the guests started to arrive. After the obligatory pleasantries and wooden stances, we started to relax and started sharing stories. One of the American men, Curt, was a larger than life character. He would have not looked out of place in a holywood action movie; and yes, he had the perfect white teeth that makes all English people envious.
One of the major talking points for the evening was the lack of guns in England. The Americans sat on one side of the table scratching their heads, wondering why we do not have anti-tank weapons, proximity mines and 50mm machine guns in our living rooms. On the other side of the table, the English were mesmorised by the shiny white teeth of the Americans. Curt mentioned that he has a safe full of ammunition at his home in the United States and another full of weapons. I mentioned the fact that the British Army has insufficient money and materials to supply its soldiers fighting in Afghanistan. Perhaps he could help out and ship some equipment from his ranch.
As the beer flowed and the conversation moved from topic to guns and back to other topics, I couldn't help thinking that this beats working for a living!
Tuesday, 14 September 2010
Normandy Battlefield Stories
Our house is surrounded by history and it is very easy to forget. All these years after the Normandy invasion, the countryside is now peaceful. In fact, if you didn't know that the biggest invasion in human history happened in the fields surrounding our house, it could just be any countryside. The fact is, it is not and it is steeped in history.
As I have been shopping almost everyday, I had began to forget that we are living in a special place. I had a conversation with one of our American guests and this made me realise that I was getting side tracked; this helped to relight my enthusiasm for the history and the place where I am now living.
In all of the fields around our home, the bunkers and Utah Beach itself, there is a story to tell from the Normandy invasion. In the land behind our house, there was a field hospital and a prisoner of war camp. When I told the American gent about this, I could see the amazement in his eyes. This made me think that we should never forget what happened here all those years ago. I just hope that I can do my bit to share this important history lesson with the guests who come to stay.
As I have been shopping almost everyday, I had began to forget that we are living in a special place. I had a conversation with one of our American guests and this made me realise that I was getting side tracked; this helped to relight my enthusiasm for the history and the place where I am now living.
In all of the fields around our home, the bunkers and Utah Beach itself, there is a story to tell from the Normandy invasion. In the land behind our house, there was a field hospital and a prisoner of war camp. When I told the American gent about this, I could see the amazement in his eyes. This made me think that we should never forget what happened here all those years ago. I just hope that I can do my bit to share this important history lesson with the guests who come to stay.
Monday, 13 September 2010
The Americans have landed
Another positive day today as we have finally been connected to the outside world. Our telephone and ADSL line started working today. I have never taken drugs but I imagine the sensation must be similar to how I felt when I finally established a high speed internet connection. What a relief to have a fast connection and a proper telephone line!
I didn't want to keep this sensation just for myself. I immediately went about checking the signal strength in our gites to allow us to offer our guests free WIFI. Luckily, the signal was strong enough to reach to the furthest gite so now we are happy to offer this to our guests.
We have welcomed our first American guests this evening. I don't know what it is with Americans but I can't help feeling in awe of them. I like the larger than life aura that they bring with them and I was really happy to talk with them about the history of the war. Many Americans come here on a sort of pilgrimage and many have lost loved ones on that fateful day in June 1944. I am hoping that our guests will share their D-Day stories and allow me to have them on our site.
One of the Americans asked how why we have come to Normandy to live. That is a difficult question to answer; however, I told him that we are simply carrying the baton of history for some years after which, we plan to pass onto someone else. We want to do our bit to keep the history of this great war alive for future generations to come.
I didn't want to keep this sensation just for myself. I immediately went about checking the signal strength in our gites to allow us to offer our guests free WIFI. Luckily, the signal was strong enough to reach to the furthest gite so now we are happy to offer this to our guests.
We have welcomed our first American guests this evening. I don't know what it is with Americans but I can't help feeling in awe of them. I like the larger than life aura that they bring with them and I was really happy to talk with them about the history of the war. Many Americans come here on a sort of pilgrimage and many have lost loved ones on that fateful day in June 1944. I am hoping that our guests will share their D-Day stories and allow me to have them on our site.
One of the Americans asked how why we have come to Normandy to live. That is a difficult question to answer; however, I told him that we are simply carrying the baton of history for some years after which, we plan to pass onto someone else. We want to do our bit to keep the history of this great war alive for future generations to come.
Saturday, 11 September 2010
A new front opens
En fin! Our first guests have arrived. Can we call them our first guests? As the previous owners took the reservation, are we in a position to say that? I guess the most important is that they have arrived and we have done our best to make them feel welcome.
They would have been our first guests, even if they had been booked by the previous owner; however, this morning we received a telephone call from a Canadian gentleman who lives in Paris. He decided that he wanted to come to Normandy and spend a night with his wife and children at our house. I like spontanaity and I was impressed that he woke up in the morning, decided that he wanted to come and by 1600 hours, he was in Carentan. I had arranged to pick him up and loan him the use of our second car. I realise that I was probably damaging the car rental economy in Normandy; but it seemed much simpler to do this than for him to go through process of renting.
I had planned a special surprise for our guests that would arrive later in the evening. I have made some friends in the area and they are fanatical about the war. They are also do parachute jumps all over Europe to celebrate D-Day and other airbourne operations that took place during the war. I had planned for them to greet my new guests, dressed in their full authentic world war 2 American Airborne uniforms.
Our guests had indicated that they would arrive at 1915 and true to their word, they turned up. Where were my paratroopers? This was a disappointment for me and the show did not start well. As they say though, the show must go on.
A little later, my new friends in their uniforms arrived. My children are in awe of them, but also very scared. Just like in the war, the G.I's offered sweets and chocolate to my kids. My children were very happy with this, but not with me telling them that they can't have it as it was almost dinner time. I don't suppose that happened during the war.
I retired to the garden area to have a beer with my allies and they explained that they had been to Carentan to sort out some paperwork and that they had been delayed. French beauracracy getting in the way of plans once more. Never the less, our guests had seen the soldiers pass by their window and no doubt were very intrigued. I was very happy when the decided to come outside and join us for a beer.
As it stared to get dark, my paratrooper friend suggested that we take a look at his equipment. Luckily, he had brought his collection of world war 2 items and my guests had the opportunity of handling some weapons. I am not sure how much they enjoyed this experience; however, by the looks on their faces, I would say that it went down well.
All's well that ends well; at least that is what they say. It appears that their is a new front opening and I am feeling a little over stretched. Despite being in a new country, speaking a different language and running a new business, it appears that my wife is not feeling too good either. As a result of the pregnancy and the change of life, she is feeling really low. I just hope that we can live to fight another day and not be missing in action after just one week in Normandy.
They would have been our first guests, even if they had been booked by the previous owner; however, this morning we received a telephone call from a Canadian gentleman who lives in Paris. He decided that he wanted to come to Normandy and spend a night with his wife and children at our house. I like spontanaity and I was impressed that he woke up in the morning, decided that he wanted to come and by 1600 hours, he was in Carentan. I had arranged to pick him up and loan him the use of our second car. I realise that I was probably damaging the car rental economy in Normandy; but it seemed much simpler to do this than for him to go through process of renting.
I had planned a special surprise for our guests that would arrive later in the evening. I have made some friends in the area and they are fanatical about the war. They are also do parachute jumps all over Europe to celebrate D-Day and other airbourne operations that took place during the war. I had planned for them to greet my new guests, dressed in their full authentic world war 2 American Airborne uniforms.
Our guests had indicated that they would arrive at 1915 and true to their word, they turned up. Where were my paratroopers? This was a disappointment for me and the show did not start well. As they say though, the show must go on.
A little later, my new friends in their uniforms arrived. My children are in awe of them, but also very scared. Just like in the war, the G.I's offered sweets and chocolate to my kids. My children were very happy with this, but not with me telling them that they can't have it as it was almost dinner time. I don't suppose that happened during the war.
I retired to the garden area to have a beer with my allies and they explained that they had been to Carentan to sort out some paperwork and that they had been delayed. French beauracracy getting in the way of plans once more. Never the less, our guests had seen the soldiers pass by their window and no doubt were very intrigued. I was very happy when the decided to come outside and join us for a beer.
As it stared to get dark, my paratrooper friend suggested that we take a look at his equipment. Luckily, he had brought his collection of world war 2 items and my guests had the opportunity of handling some weapons. I am not sure how much they enjoyed this experience; however, by the looks on their faces, I would say that it went down well.
All's well that ends well; at least that is what they say. It appears that their is a new front opening and I am feeling a little over stretched. Despite being in a new country, speaking a different language and running a new business, it appears that my wife is not feeling too good either. As a result of the pregnancy and the change of life, she is feeling really low. I just hope that we can live to fight another day and not be missing in action after just one week in Normandy.
Thursday, 9 September 2010
Biting the hand that feeds us
After my post yesterday, I had a great piece of news. The Doctor has told my wife that she should stop working and rest until the baby is born. As a result, she arrived late last night to surprise us all. What a relief; reinforcements had arrived!
Her first request the next day was to go shopping. So here we go again off to Carentan. Luckily, today it was only for a few small items. We managed to find a store that was something like the pound shops in England. I was very relived to see that the total for todays shopping was less than 10 euros. This did make too much of a dent into our finances, unlike the previous few days.
We had parked across the road and as a result, we had to cross over the main road leading into Carentan. My hands were full with our new purchases and as I ran across the road, I dropped a small brush that we had bought. A lady driving a car had noticed this and stopped and sounded her horn. By this time, both lanes of traffic had stopped to see the spectacle. The look on the ladies face in the car was of pity. I had my heavily pregnant wife on one side of the road and she must have thought we were romanian gypsies who were walking back to their caravan. Of the few items I had, this included a bottle of mayonaise for Alice the au pair, some batteries and a pizza cutter, and of course the brush that was causing the hold up.
A little later that night, we received an email from a client who has booked to stay with us next week. He had been told that despite not staying for a full week, he would have to pay the for the full week. This is something that the previous owners of Ivy House had insisted on. We are trying to run a business and need to make a living; however, we decided to reduce the price for the gentleman to the price that we thought was fairer. I guess we are biting the hand that feeds us and as we are in business, we should make as much as we can. We don't see it quite like that and we want our clients to feel that they have been treated fairly. Will this mean we will fail in our Normandy adventure? We will have to wait and see!
Her first request the next day was to go shopping. So here we go again off to Carentan. Luckily, today it was only for a few small items. We managed to find a store that was something like the pound shops in England. I was very relived to see that the total for todays shopping was less than 10 euros. This did make too much of a dent into our finances, unlike the previous few days.
We had parked across the road and as a result, we had to cross over the main road leading into Carentan. My hands were full with our new purchases and as I ran across the road, I dropped a small brush that we had bought. A lady driving a car had noticed this and stopped and sounded her horn. By this time, both lanes of traffic had stopped to see the spectacle. The look on the ladies face in the car was of pity. I had my heavily pregnant wife on one side of the road and she must have thought we were romanian gypsies who were walking back to their caravan. Of the few items I had, this included a bottle of mayonaise for Alice the au pair, some batteries and a pizza cutter, and of course the brush that was causing the hold up.
A little later that night, we received an email from a client who has booked to stay with us next week. He had been told that despite not staying for a full week, he would have to pay the for the full week. This is something that the previous owners of Ivy House had insisted on. We are trying to run a business and need to make a living; however, we decided to reduce the price for the gentleman to the price that we thought was fairer. I guess we are biting the hand that feeds us and as we are in business, we should make as much as we can. We don't see it quite like that and we want our clients to feel that they have been treated fairly. Will this mean we will fail in our Normandy adventure? We will have to wait and see!
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